“We are what we repeatedly do.” – Aristotle
We are creatures of habit. Our daily habits are directed by our beliefs: we are what we think and what we do. Daily. A large part of what we do every day isn’t as a result of a conscious decision. It’s a habit. 40 percent, in fact. (Our brains likes this because it makes the job of being the brain sooo much easier). Where you are in life today is largely a result of actions you don’t even think about anymore. Let that sink in a minute…
Now, the good news is we CAN take control of our life by changing our habits. Depending on who you ask, a habit can take anywhere from 21-66 days to take root in the brain. So we’ve got three weeks to three months to make it a no-brainer (pun intended, of course).
A group of researchers at MIT discovered the process which is the basis for every habit’s formation. If we are going to change our habits, we have to understand how they get created. Every habit is formed by a three step process:
1. Cue. The trigger that tells your brain which habit to use.
2. Routine. The behavior (or emotion) that gets triggered.
3. Reward. How the brain decides if the process is worth it.
An example: You get finally get the kids to bed *sigh* and want to release the day’s stress (cue). You grab bottle of wine (routine). You feel calm and relaxed (reward).
The cue and the reward are the big pushers in this process. So if we want to change the routine we are going to make sure the new habit gives our brain the same reward feeling. Otherwise, the brain will see it as too hard and instead reinforce the old habit we are wanting to change. NOT what we want. If the reward is to feel calm and relaxed, we’ve got to think of something else that can give us that feeling when we are stressed at the end of our day. Maybe we can exchange the bottle of wine for reading a book (something fiction, please) or watching something on Netflix. Over time, our brains will start to replace the routine of grabbing that bottle of wine with grabbing the latest must-have novel. This is what I like to call an UPGRADE to an existing habit.
The same concept works when we are trying to ADD a habit “from scratch”. We’ve got to figure out the cue, routine and reward for the habit in order to make sure it cements in our brains. Willpower is needed to DELETE a habit. It might be the hardest of all in the Add-Delete-Upgrade scenario, but it is possible Willpower is a muscle, not a skill. The more we exercise our willpower the easier it becomes to use it (just like our actual muscles, willpower gets stronger).
Like I said at the beginning of this (looooong) post, our beliefs direct our habits. We first need to believe we can make the changes we want, then we will create action, which results in making the changes a reality!
If you want to know more about habits, check out the book The Power of Habit by Charles Duhigg.
I’m so looking forward to starting the 31 day Healthy Habit Overhaul tomorrow!! I’ll be posting over on Instagram every day with the daily habit as well as how I’m making it happen in my own life See ya there!
Light and Love,
♥k
I love this!
😊 Happy New Year Mary!!