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Day 9: Set Office Hours

“Be aware when distractions come your way. You’ll know it’s a distraction when you stop doing what you’re supposed to be doing and find yourself pondering things that have no value.” – Beverly R. Imes

Electronic devices and social media aren’t going anywhere.  If anything they are becoming more and more a dominating force in our lives.  And this kind of scares me.  While I love the convenience of technology (example: I got the sweetest picture of my 5 year old during her first day of school yesterday from her teacher while at recess), part of me yearns for the days when you left home in the morning and no one could reach you by phone until you got home in the evening.  It was a much slower time and I miss it (at times). Everything is so fast paced now, if you blink you’re behind.  And it’s wearing us down.  Kids are stressed, parents are stressed…everyone is stressed.

What can we do?  We certainly can’t be without our phones…going back isn’t an option once we’ve swallowed the technology pill.   My first suggestion is to create “Office Hours” for your social media accounts. What this means is ONLY checking your social media accounts during certain times of the day. What I’ve done is put all of my social media apps, as well as my email,  in one little app bubble (no idea what they’re called, but I’m SURE they have a name) and labeled it ’12-2 ONLY’. The idea is that I will only open the bubble and look at any of the apps contained in there between 12-2pm.  This is when I have decided that I have the time to look at/respond to these things.  For you, it may be a different time, or even multiple times a day. (I have really let this habit slide over the summer, so this is designed to get me back in gear, too).

Second suggestion is to turn off all (non-pertinent) notifications.  I keep my text notifications on and the app my daughter’s kindergarten teacher uses, but everything else I don’t see/hear until I check it.  I have a friend that, in addition to turning off notifications, turns her screen to grayscale so that the excitability of the display is diminished, and she’s less likely to get distracted. (I haven’t tried this yet, but it seems like it would work).  A recent study  {loooong article} shows that even having the phone in the same room as you, EVEN IF IT’S OFF,  is a distraction.

So figure out what time works for you to do what you need to within the social media and email platforms and make your bubble.  (Please don’t make it first thing when you wake up in the morning…this might be worse for your health than watching the news when you first wake up.   Give yourself a little time before you start the busyness of your day). Also, you might be surprised at how many times, out of habit, you go to open that (damn) bubble it when it’s not time.  I know I was. My advice: STOP, DROP and DON’T SCROLL.

Light and Love,

♥k

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Day 8: Sorry, not sorry!

“If you don’t stop apologizing, you’re going to convince me you’ve done something wrong.”— Kate Morton

Today’s challenge topic was originally planned to be something else. Now don’t worry, it’s still going to make an appearance. But life with three kids happened yesterday and I felt lead to speak on this now.  So we are going to talk about giving ourselves grace and stop using I’m sorry unnecessarily.

When I had a jam packed day yesterday {hello back to school week} and couldn’t get to my computer to type up the blog post for Day 7 my first thought was I need to apologize.  Then I sat with that feeling for a minute and realized I wasn’t, in fact, sorry.  I felt bad, certainly, because I hadn’t lived up to the bargain I made with myself and my readers {thanks ya’ll} that I would post and share every day of this challenge.  But I wasn’t truly sorry.  Why not? Because I had the most amazing day with my children on the eve of Back to School Eve.  We had pool time, grandpa time, back to school hair cuts, lunch, puppy time, met our new teachers as well as new and old friends.  It was packed to the brim, but it was AMAZING!  And I knew that I could still write what I planned and get it posted this morning. I’ll have two posts today, no biggie.

Then I started thinking about how many times we (especially women) say I’m sorry, when it’s not what we mean at all.  We seem to use it as a filler for when we don’t know what to say. We now use it in place of Excuse me when we think we are in someones way or when someone is in OUR way.  Does that even make sense?  It’s like we are apologizing for our existence.  Newsflash: this is not healthy. Try and be conscious today of how many times you say it, I think you’ll be shocked.  It’s one of those habits we aren’t even aware we’ve developed.  And we need to stop.  Keep I’m sorry for those times when you truly are sorry like when someone is sick, injured or you have hurt someone.  I’m sorry will have so much more meaning when we stop using it when we don’t mean it.

Light and Love,

♥k

(I’m going to start using another word when I feel compelled to say sorry.  I haven’t figured the word out yet, but I’ll keep you posted. Let me know in the comments if there’s something you use instead of sorry.  I’d love to hear your ideas.)

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Day 7: Get up!! Get up!! Get up!!!

“Most geniuses are just talented people who get up really early in the morning. – Joel Achenbach

Sleep is important.  (So important it’s Day 3 of this challenge).  Also important is getting up a little before you need to.  I find this especially true since I’ve had children.  I like to get up a minimum of half an hour, ideally an hour, before they do.  This time is my SANITY.  I haven’t done this very ofter over summer break and it shows.  {Eeeeeeek}  This is the time that is just for me.  I meditate first, because that’s one of my daily non-negotiables.  The remaining time I might read, write in my gratitude journal or even create my grocery list. Basically I do anything that’s difficult to accomplish once my three girls are up and LOUD moving.

Take a few moments and think about what you could do with a quiet 30 minutes at the start of your day. Maybe for you it’s a time to pray or read your Bible.  Maybe you’ll make some coffee or tea and sit and drink it quietly doing nothing at all {sounds amazing}.  Now, there is only rule to this challenge, it is that you NOT get distracted during this time.  You know what I mean…this isn’t the time to start picking up clothes or taking the trash out, unless you find these things relaxing {I’ve heard these people exist}, because then you’ll have gone down the rabbit hole.  If you don’t know what I’m talking about or just need a chuckle, watch this. I feel like this most summer days. {sigh}
Make sure you are taking this time to set the intention for your day and see how the rest of your day seems to flow better. It is life changing!

Light and Love,

♥k

(And no, you’re not crazy, this post is a day late, because LIFE happens).

 

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Day 6: Become a Flexitarian (embrace Meatless Monday)

“Nothing will benefit human health and increase the chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet.” – Albert Einstein 

Going vegetarian (or vegan) is a scary proposition for most of us.  We think what will we eat? Where will we get our protein? I get it.  I’ve been there.  I went completely plant-based (for a while) a couple of years ago after reading Dr. Michael Greger’s book How Not to Die.  (Great info in this book, btw). But it was like learning how to eat all over again.  The main obstacle with the plant-based lifestyle is it’s so foreign to us that most of us won’t even try. Enter the flexitarian. {Ta-Daaaaa!!} It’s an easy way to transition from a meat heavy diet to a more flexible way of eating where meat is NOT the main attraction. 

It’s different, no doubt. But we can all change what we eat one day a week.  This is where the Meatless Monday campaign came into play (back in 2003). The idea is that if everyone removes meat from their diet one day each week, it reduces the demand for meat production by 15%.  (You can really pick any day of the week that works for your schedule, but Meatless Monday sure is catchy).   My tip is to try and work it into the beginning of the week rather than the end.  Your willpower may start to diminish the closer you get to the weekend.  And if you don’t think you can do a whole day, start with just dinner and work up to more of your meals.

There are two main reasons for eating less meat: increased health benefits and a reduction in our carbon footprint. Some of the reported benefits of reducing your meat (especially processed) consumption are: lower risk of diabetes, obesity and heart disease, as well as lower blood pressure and cholesterol.  Eating less factory farmed beef reduces our carbon footprint because fewer resources like water and grains are needed if we are eating fewer cattle.  In case you didn’t know, it takes 1850 gallons of water to produce a pound of beef.  That’s A LOT of water.  (For comparison it takes 39 gallons of water to produce a pound of vegetables).

Do some searching, there are tons of delicious vegetarian recipes to be found out there.  Pick a new recipe each week and at the end of this month you will have several meatless meals your family (and you) will enjoy. (Here’s a recipe for a yummy burrito bowl you can try for your Meatless Monday dish this week).  And maybe, just maybe, after a few weeks you’ll realize you like flexitarianism and continue this lifestyle for the health of you and your family.

Light and Love (and veggies),

♥k

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Day 5: Smile…it’s healthy AND free!

“Smile, it is the key that fits the lock of everyone’s heart”― Anthony J. D’Angelo

Is it me or does it seem like everyone is living in their own little bubble? We have all these fancy devices that allow us to be connected to, well,  EVERYTHING. But the reality is this overwhelming virtual connection allows us to pull away from the human to human connection we all need. As a result people are feeling more disconnected than ever.  Check out this recent article on the rise of suicide rates in the U.S.  (While it doesn’t name this disconnection as a cause for the spike, I can’t help but think it plays a part, especially for people who don’t have a diagnosed mental illness).

A great way to create connection and boost our (and others) health is a simple SMILE.   How can smiling benefit our health you ask? There are lots of ways!! Here are just a few:

  • Releases endorphins. These can help reduce stress AND boost our moods.
  • Creates empathy. We unconsciously smile when we feel embarrassed, which is an ice breaker and creates empathy from those around us.
  • Pain reducer.  Smiling, especially in conjunction with laughter, can reduce pain.
  • Confidence.  People who smile are judged to be more confident than those who don’t. (Remember this at your next job interview).
  • Look younger. {YESSSSSSSS!!} Smiling naturally lifts your face and makes you appear younger. {Take that laugh lines!}

Number one reason to smile: It’s CONTAGIOUS!!  Half of people will smile back when you do.  This can create a ripple effect through the rest of their day (and yours).  And so on, and so on. Think about it…your one smile can change the world.  Get to it!!  {Cheeeeeeeese!}

Light and Love,

♥k

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The Day My World Turned Upside Down

I came up with the name for this blog about two years ago.  I had no idea what I was doing (literally, I’m completely clueless with internet/technology stuff).  More importantly, I  was unsure of what my focus should be…trials of motherhood, minimalist/de-cluttered lifestyle, nutrition, home renovation projects??  I’m fairly knowledgeable and interested in all of these things, but still, I just didn’t know.  Nothing felt like the perfect fit. Nothing screamed “this is YOUR purpose“.   I was drawn to the idea of an upside down umbrella, but I couldn’t put my finger on exactly why.

Fast forward almost two years (and one half-assed blog post, haha) and I suddenly find myself in the blind-sided moment for which I had unknowingly created this platform. Three months ago IT happened. The phone call. The dreaded words. “You have papillary carcinoma.”   I didn’t know it at the time, but doctors don’t like to say the word cancer…definitely not as much as patients hate hearing it, but still, every doctor I have seen since that date has avoided saying the C word.   It was three  days after that first phone call before anyone said it to my face and it wasn’t my doctor, but one of his staff.  She said it so nonchalantly, yet matter of fact, I almost burst into tears on the spot.

Everything after being told you have cancer feels, well, upside down…it feels wrong, it feels overwhelming, it feels surreal, it feels like there is no air and too much air all at the same time. It’s a life changing moment that you can never turn back from.  (No matter how freaking badly you want to).  It has taken me three months to go through all the stages of grief associated with such a diagnosis and now here I am, ready to do battle and ready to share my journey in hopes that I can help others who, just like me, have become an upside down umbrella.

 

Light and Love,

K

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Thresholds

I had an “a-ha” moment the other day, when thinking about this journey I’ve been on for more than three years. We all have a threshold when it comes to our possessions.  Thresholds exist for most things…we have a threshold for pain, a patience threshold (one I’m constantly working on), a threshold for the number of shows our DVR will hold. My DVR’s threshold is extremely high and yet I still find myself having to go and pick through which of my kids 100+ shows I can delete to make room for what I want to watch. (More on this in another post). I had just never really thought about there being a tipping point when it comes to my possessions.

The problem is we think our possessions threshold is in direct correlation to the size of the spaces we live in and this is where we go wrong.  Terribly, overwhelmingly wrong.  See, as your house fills up with belongings you think, ugh, we need a bigger house.  And so you go about looking for a bigger house, usually buying the one with the most square footage (or most storage) within your budget.  The problem is you move all of your possessions into this new house without getting rid of all the things you don’t really need. This house has a ton of storage, you think you will never fill it up…But you do. Two years later you are overwhelmed (again) with the amount of STUFF you have accumulated, on top of the 15 (or so) boxes sitting in your garage/basement/storage room that you never got around to unpacking when you moved in.  Only now, you have also reached your mortgage threshold (see, they’re everywhere) and there is no way you can move to another, even bigger house.  And so you feel overwhelmed, and tired and just weighed down by all. this. stuff.

Now, having more space means you CAN have more things,  but it doesn’t mean you should.  At the end of the day, you are one person. One person with a threshold of what you can accomplish in a day.  You can only pick up so much, work so much, clean so much and even think about so much in a day. This is why our homes (and our heads) feel so overwhelmed.  We have met and greatly exceeded our thresholds.

So, how do you begin reducing your stuff? Pick a space in your house, a closet, a cabinet or even a drawer (the JUNK drawer is a good place to start). Open it, look at it’s contents.  Has this space exceeded it’s threshold? Go through and eliminate what you can from it.  Trash the trash, put the things that don’t belong there where they should go.  If you have multiples of the same item, keep the one you actually use and donate the rest.  You’ll know this space is within it’s threshold when you can look at it and no longer feel the overwhelming weight of too much. Then…move on to the next space!

Light and Love,

Kendra